Onions

The other day, I was at the mall, browsing. I am in the music store, looking at DVD's - I am trying to find Memoirs of A Geisha, haven't seen it yet, when all of a sudden, I smell something horrible. Like rotting onions. There is this girl beside me and she STINKS! So I move away, but it's like she's coming after me and raising her arm right next to my face. I wanted to tell her to go and buy some deoderant. And the thing is, it is like she was stalking me, every store I went into in the mall, there she was, right beside me. Wreaking. OK, I get the natural thing, not wanting to pollute your body yadda yadda yadda, but there are natural deoderants, man. Buy one of them. I get that maybe she just forgot that morning to put deoderant on, but the drugstore is in the mall. Buy a new one. Put it on, and the whole world is happy. I am against not wearing deoderant and for some reason, there are a number of people in Israel who don't wear deoderant. I just think that we should think about other people. If we don't want to wear deoderant for ourselves, than do it as a mitzvah for others. I have a much more heightened sense of smell now. Do it for me. That is air pollution. She should have been fined for emitting toxins in a public place, as for that matter, should people who fart in elevators. Or Superstore (and you know who you are!).
I would like to give birth in Canada, although I have a very good ob/gyn here. She is very nice. I would like to move back home. I am still not in love with Israel. I even miss the rain. We do want to come back. We are waiting for the visa. I should write the play, Waiting For A Visa...Not Without My Husband. Maybe I could smuggle him to Turkey...